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Second Chance to Live

Empowering the Individual, Not the Brain Injury

Brain Injury and Self-Pity — A Way Out

October 7, 2015 By Second Chance to Live

life-862985_1920 self-pity

Yesterday, I wrote an article, The Brain Injury Community, and Self-Pity. My motive in being direct and blunt was to give a wake-up call to people living with brain injuries. In my experience, I need to remind myself of what I shared in the article, as I can also find myself distracted by self-pity when things are not going my way. I, too; need to guard myself against the scourge of self-pity and whining so that I can stay proactive in my life and with my ongoing process as I pursue my course and run my own race. My motivation was not to shame anyone because they find themselves in self-pity; but to encourage my readers to realize that self-pity and whining are NOT PRODUCTIVE, NOT BENEFICIAL and serves to UNDERMINE. I, too; need to remember the impact of self-pity, when I find myself focusing on what I would like to be different in my life, but is out of my control. I, too; then need to step back and think about the following quote and remember that I have choices, that will present themselves to me.

“If you don’t like something, change it. If you can not change it, change the way you think about it.” Mary Engelbreit

I also need to remember that this experience, that is called life; is not a dress rehearsal. I, too; need to get and stay busy to own and empower the life that I am given the circumstances that I am presented with, regardless of whether I like them or not. I am responsible. That is what I encourage my readers to — take responsibility for their lives — instead of waiting for someone in a system, that may not have our best interests in mind; to save or rescue us. Saving or rescuing us is simply not going to happen and to believe so is to put your life into the hands of people who may have hidden motives and agendas and may want to exploit you as an individual living with a brain injury. Take what you learn from them and then make it your mission to learn to thrive in life. You and I are the only ones who can live our lives as more than victims. There is no silver bullet or magic potion to make us better. It just takes a concerted effort, with tenacity and persistence at the helm of running our own race and staying committed to our course.

Self-pity is not our friend and will interfere with our desire to create a second chance to live with our lives after sustaining brain injuries. That is why it is very important to be aware of the impact that self-pity and whining have upon our lives. Neither self-pity nor whining will get us anywhere, change anything or give us the ability to create hope or a second chance to live our lives.

Self-Pity — A Way Out

In my experience, I discovered that there were factors that contributed to my staying stuck in self-pity. It was not because I wanted to stay in self-pity, but because I did not know any better. In my experience, when certain events occurred in my life I began to look for a way out. A way out of staying in self-pity. Through my recovery process I stumbled upon lessons that changed my life forever. These lessons helped me to begin to create a second chance to live long after I sustained my traumatic brain injury. The lessons that I learned can help you to create a second chance to live in your life, if you are a long time survivor of a traumatic or acquired brain injury or if you only recently sustained a traumatic of acquired brain injury. On June 16, 2015 I launched another website, Create a Spark of Hope to catalog the lessons that I learned that helped me in my process of replacing self-pity with hope and helped me to begin to create a second chance to live while living with the impact of a traumatic brain injury and an invisible disability.

In the event that you are having a difficult time finding hope or creating a second chance to live in your life, I would invite you to click on this link, Site Map of Articles; and read from my articles. The lessons that I share with in my articles helped me to find and create hope in my life, which in turn helped me to begin to build a second chance to live in my life. My encouragement to you would be to begin reading articles from my Site Map of Articles. By doing so you may find that the self-pity that you have been experiencing will be replaced with hope. By gaining hope, you may begin to see your situation and circumstances in a new light which in turn will help you to begin to build a second chance to live in your life a brain injury survivor.

Please share this article with anyone who you believe is struggling to create a second chance to live after sustaining a traumatic or acquired brain injury. By doing so, you may be the channel and the life line that gives them the hope they may have been searching for a long time. Thank you.

To gain further insight into why I have adopted the vital perspective that I share within The Brain Injury Community and Self-Pity, you may click on the following link: Why I Needed to Challenge My Brain Injury Awareness

You have my permission to share my articles and or video presentations with anyone you believe could benefit, however please attribute me as being the author of the article (s) video presentation (s), and provide a link back to the article (s) on Second Chance to Live. In the event that you have questions, please send those questions to me. All questions are good questions. Thank you. I look forward to hearing from you. Copyright 2007-2016.

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The Second Chance to Live Trauma-Informed Care AI Collaboration Model™ was founded and documented by Craig J. Phillips, MRC, BA in May 2025. All rights reserved under U.S. copyright, Creative Commons licensing, and public record. This is an original, working model of trauma-informed care human–AI collaboration — not open-source, not conceptual, and not replicable without written permission.

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