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Second Chance to Live

Empowering the Individual, Not the Brain Injury

What is my Destiny?

February 22, 2007 By Second Chance to Live

Hello and welcome back to Second Chance to Live. I am so happy to see that you decided to stop by to visit with me. You are always welcome around my table. Several years ago the movie, Forrest Gump was applauded by those who watched Forrest’s determination. Several lines from that movie stood out to me. “Life is like a box of chocolates, you never know what you are going to get”. The second line that resonated with me was when Forrest asked his mother, along the lines of “What is my destiny Mama?” Both these lines rang true to me. I felt like I had been given a box full of dark chocolate, bitter to my taste and that my destiny was fading into a dark comedy of errors. I have since discovered that I was blind and could not see.

Helen Keller summed up my plight so accurately, “When one door closes, another opens. But we often look so regretfully upon the closed door that we don’t see the one that has opened for us.”

I was so focused on what I wanted and expected to happen, that I could not see what was happening. But it was not time. I still had to learn the lessons that my journey would reveal. One such lesson was a hard lesson to learn. My training in the martial arts opened my eyes. For many years I was focused on the next promotion and the color of my belt. When I was not promoted as quickly as my peers I asked my Instructor, ‘Why?”. He told me that I was not ready.

“Why?” I was not ready mystified me because I trained hard. As I continued to train I struggled to understand. One day I had a spiritual awakening that changed my life. I began to realize — as with a new dawn — that the outcome of a promotion or a belt color change was not as important as what I was learning on my journey — towards being promoted and earning the next rank and color. With my awareness my martial arts training took on a new meaning which helped me to refocus my life. In the process, my motivation in life changed forever.

The process took on a new meaning. The process became of far greater importance than obtaining a brown or black belt or for that matter any other outcome in life.

I have learned that becoming fully present in the moment equips me to empty my mind of expectation. This discipline helps me to focus my energy and thus develop my own jeet kune do. I have learned that life does not have to look different than it does. My destiny is yet to be revealed. I do not need to build a legacy. My life paints, as it were with a brush each day and with each process — and that is good enough.

Courage helps me to be willing to learn the next lesson and to keep painting. With each brush stroke — process — my destiny becomes apparent.

“Don’t judge each day by the harvest you reap, but by the seeds you plant.” Robert Louis Stevenson

More ways to experience your destiny, The Measure of Destiny?

As you listen to, watch or read my articles and questions come to mind, please send those questions to mind. All questions are good questions. In the event that you would like to leave a comment, I would love to hear from you.To do so, please use the below contact form. I will respond to your comments and questions.

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I look forward to hearing from you.

Have a great day.

Craig

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Filed Under: Finding Purpose after a Brain Injury

Comments

  1. Shelley says

    February 23, 2007 at 12:32 am

    Oh, devilish Expectations! If only I can put it in my heart ‘that life doesn’t have to look different than it does.” I’m always wondering if I’m missing something. I feel like I’m renting space in my life sometimes, and not really owning it.

    Reply
  2. Alistair says

    March 1, 2007 at 4:49 am

    Congratuations- you’ve rediscovered the simple spiritual use for martial arts. Bodhidarma would be proud of you, especially seeing the culture of egoism that has risen from his legacy.

    Reply
  3. lydia2007 says

    September 22, 2007 at 1:38 pm

    About a year ago, I realized most of the wounds I had suffered in life came from unmet expectations – of others, of myself, and yes, probably of God. How freeing it was when I became able to let go of those (often unrealistic) expectations.

    Reply
  4. Kristin says

    March 15, 2008 at 10:57 pm

    I want to say congratulations–I work with TBI patients and some have the potential to leave this company and go back to a somewhat normal life. I found your site by looking for inspiration for them–thank you for telling your story.

    Reply
  5. secondchancetolive says

    March 15, 2008 at 11:20 pm

    Hi Kristin,
    Thank you for taking the time to leave a comment. Thank you also for your kindness. Please do share Second Chance to Live with the families of the TBI survivors. I believe they could benefit from my experience, strength and hope. Please do share several my posts with the survivors, Following your bliss…regardless https://secondchancetolive.org/2007/04/30/passion/ and The Power of Identification https://secondchancetolive.org/2007/04/18/the-power-of-identification/.

    If you did not notice I have a Site Map https://secondchancetolive.org/site-map/ that currently lists 237 of the published posts found with in Second Chance to Live. Not all of the titles have Traumatic Brain Injury or Living with a Disability with in their titles, however all of the
    posts are designed to help the reader to live life on life’s terms. Our circumstances are not meant to keep us down, but they are meant to build us up!

    Please do not hesitate to contact me in the future, if I may be of assistance to you, other staff members, the survivors or their family / friends Kristen.

    Thank you for your time and kindness.

    Have a wonderfilled weekend and God bless you.

    Craig

    Reply
  6. JT says

    September 30, 2010 at 8:57 am

    Hi. 3year ago I had TBI. And I know the live had before is no more. But I love my new live. And being TBI surviors I now this is going to be a war I’m going to in for the rest of my live. The thing I like to do afore I can’t do them all but I try. I do’t Hunt now but some day. I’m geting my golf game back. I go to a TBI meeting and the first one I went To Know I was not alone. So thank for all the help on this site.

    Reply
    • secondchancetolive says

      September 30, 2010 at 3:25 pm

      Hi JT,
      Thank you so very much for taking the time to write to me. I am honored by you doing so my friend. Sounds like you are on your journey. If you have any questions, please feel free to ask JT. All questions are good questions.

      I do not know if you are aware that I have a Site Map — which has a listing of all the articles that I have written for Second Chance to Live JT. Here is the address to my Site Map https://secondchancetolive.org/site-map/. Each article title is a live link, so by clicking on the title you will be taken to the actual article JT.

      Many of the articles that I write are written in parts because of the length of the article. I have written an article on how to use Second Chance to Live. Here is the link to that article JT https://secondchancetolive.org/how-to-use-second-chance-to-live/.

      Each of the articles that I write I write from the position of identification. I have written an article to share my thoughts on the power of identification. Here is a link to that article JT My Focus https://secondchancetolive.org/my-focus/

      My encouragement to you is that any time you are feeling alone or isolated JT, please spend some time reading articles from my web site http://www.secondchancetolive.wordpress.com and remember I am always here for you my friend.

      Have a pleasant evening and God bless you and your family JT.

      Craig

      Craig J. Phillips MRC, BA
      Second Chance to Live
      http://www.secondchancetolive.wordpress.com

      Because our circumstances are not meant to keep us down, but they are meant to build us up!

      Reply

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