Hello and welcome back to Second Chance to Live my friend. I am happy to see that you decided to stop by to visit with me. Thank you. If someone else has not already welcomed you to 2011, let me be the first to say Happy New Year.
With the start of a new year, I hear people asking one another a similar question, “What is your new year’s resolution?”As I heard this question being asked, I reflected upon what answer I would give if I was asked, “What is your new year’s resolution?”
As I reflected, several thoughts and quotes came to mind. These thoughts and quotes remind me that I can restart my day over at any time. These thoughts and quotes help me to look at my circumstances and experiences in a different light. These thoughts and quotes encourage, inspire and give me focus.
May you also be encouraged and inspired by these thoughts and quotes.
In life, I need to remember that there are no such thing as a happy victim.
Happiness is an inside job. When I look outside of myself — for happiness — I set myself up to be disappointed. I am responsible for my own happiness.
“It is not what happens to you, but how you react to it that matters.” Epictetus
“I am only one, but still I am one. I cannot do everything, but still, I can do something; And because I cannot do everything I will not refuse to do the something that I can do.” Helen Keller
“I have not failed, I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work” Thomas Edison — inventor of the light bulb and many other inventions
“Opportunity is missed by most people because it is dressed in overalls and looks like work.” Thomas Edison
“Enjoy the little things, for one day you may look back and realize they were the big things.” Robert Brault
“It’s choice–not chance–that determines your destiny.” Jean Nidetch
“There are two ways of spreading light; to be a candle or a mirror that reflects it.” Edith Wharton
“What lies behind us, and what lies before us, are tiny matters compared to what lies within us.” Ralph Waldo Emerson
“Courage does not always roar, sometimes it is a quiet voice at the end of the day, saying “I will try again tomorrow.” Mary Ann Radmacher
“Regardless of your lot in life, you can build something beautiful on it.” Zig Zigler
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I was hit by a car in 2001…from then on I almost died multiple times in my life after that. I am struggling with my acquired brain injury. Before I tried to play it off as if it wasn’t me who got hit and I remain to be who I was before. I barely remember how I really was before anyways. Nobody understands me, they can try but they will not succeed, at least I know they won’t cuz it’s impossible. Now, in a way I guess I see the accident as my second chance at life-but life scares me. I react to things but I’m not sure if they’re right or wrong. I know what you’re thinking: black or white. I believe I am starting to see grey, but that changes frequently. I see clearly, I am realizing I am me. I am not treated like an “alien” anymore, at first I was when it happened. Every brain injured victim is important, but I think between me and everybody else-my everyday and life problems are the most important ones to be solved. I get so paranoid at times, my mind believes that everyone thinks and knows I have a brain injury, even the strangers walking down the street. At the same time I start to let it all get to me and my subconscious takes over and I somehow-without knowing for myself make it more obvious. Why do I expect myself and others to be perfect since the accident? I constantly think about situations that haven’t even happened yet-what the people I see could say and how I will respond. I think in my head now about ways to answer questions if I get asked anything or something happens regarding me. I correct problems that haven’t even came to be yet. I see myself always looking for something wrong in my life. I know everyone is stereotypical, all the same you know? But not me, because I am me and me is not anyone else. Do I wish I remembered getting hit?? Yes,no, but maybe? I challenge myself without thinking and constantly have to prove things to myself to make me satisfied. I am so used to being let down and disappointed that I find myself expecting the worst, I don’t see why people think of it positively when it could go either way. Expect that it will go wrong or be surprised when it doesn’t? Pessimistic or optimistic am I? Well I would say both. It’s as if it’s true and it’s not. I complicate things to the point of giving myself a headache…it’s quite funny when you think about it.
I don’t know if it’s realization of something that hasn’t been determined, the drugs I was taking in the past, or the accident. A gift…yes the accident was a gift because it changed me, for the better. I am not paralyzed, blind and I walk fine. I can hear…the walking miracle I want to call myself. I know what could have been, but it didn’t. My thinking process is just impaired-for the better and for the worse. Defending myself I find I always do, whether I have to or not. Paranoid? At times, yes. Sometimes standing up for myself just comes naturally but it tends to get out of control.
Thank you for listening.
Writing back is your option, though I hope you will.
Hello Riahannon,
Thank you for taking the time to write to me. I appreciate your processing. In my experience, I have found that I can not know, until I know and most of the time I can not begin to know unless I ask questions — of myself and other people. So I applaud you for asking those questions of yourself and to me. I will share my experience with you in reflection to your questions. What is I have found becomes fairly obvious upon reflection. Each individual is unique in their personality and their disposition. Each brain injuury is also unique to the individual.
I have also found that many people are not in touch with themselves or take the time to slow down enough to be introspective. I have found that introspection is definitely worth the time and investment as I have gained increasing awareness, which has led to a greater acceptance of who I am as a person. So, by you taking the time to ask questions of yourself and other people you are gaining greater awareness and acceptance of yourself. I am proud of you Riahannon for taking the time to be introspective.
In my experience I have found that being perfect is an allusion and merely a way in which I attempt to control my environment so that I do not experience shame and abandonment. I have written articles in which I share what I have learned through my course of introspection. I believe you will be able to identify with me my friend. I will list those articles below and include links to those articles. Give the articles a read, as I believe the information that I present with in the articles will give you the answers to your questions. Let me know what you learn and if the articles answer your questions Riahannon.
I also have a Site Map with a list of the articles that I have written for Second Chance to Live. Currently I have 723 articles listed in my Site Map with links to those articles. Here is the link to my Site Map my friend https://secondchancetolive.org/site-map/
I will say so long for now. Have a pleasant, peaceful and rewarding day and God bless both you and your family Riahannon.
Craig
The Power of Identification https://secondchancetolive.org/2007/04/18/the-power-of-identification/
Small Successes https://secondchancetolive.org/2007/02/13/small-sucesses/
Whose Life are you Living https://secondchancetolive.org/2007/02/26/23/
Flight of the Butterfly https://secondchancetolive.org/2007/03/02/flight-of-the-butterfly/
So that is the Culprit https://secondchancetolive.org/2007/03/10/so-that-is-the-culprit/
How fast are you running? https://secondchancetolive.org/2007/03/20/how-fast-are-you-running/
What is keeping you stuck? https://secondchancetolive.org/2007/03/21/did-you-see-that/
Who is limiting you? https://secondchancetolive.org/2007/05/07/who-is-limiting-you/
Traumatic Brain Injury and Denial – My Perspective as a TBI Survivor https://secondchancetolive.org/2007/05/12/traumatic-brain-injury-and-denial-my-perspective-as-a-tbi-survivor/
Are you living in a box? https://secondchancetolive.org/2007/04/25/are-you-living-in-a-box/
Don’t Talk, Don’t Trust, Don’t Feel https://secondchancetolive.org/2007/05/24/don%E2%80%99t-talk-don%E2%80%99t-trust-and-don%E2%80%99t-feel/
The Three Rules – Consequences https://secondchancetolive.org/2007/05/24/the-three-rules-revisited-consequences/
My Struggle Living with an Invisible Disability a 4 part series https://secondchancetolive.org/2007/08/14/my-struggle-living-with-an-invisible-disability/
Having an Invisible Disability – The Consequences of Denying my Reality https://secondchancetolive.org/2007/08/21/having-an-invisible-disability-%E a 2 part series 2%80%93-the-consequence-of-denying-my-reality%E2%80%94part-1/
Traumatic Brain Injury and the Double Bind https://secondchancetolive.org/2007/08/28/traumatic-brain-injury-and-the-double-bind/
Traumatic Brain Injury and the Grieving Process a 7 part series https://secondchancetolive.org/2008/05/25/traumatic-brain-injury-and-the-grieving-process-%E2%80%93-part-1/
The Cracked Pot https://secondchancetolive.org/2007/05/21/the-cracked-pot/
Traumatic Brain Injury and the Identified Patient a 2 part series
https://secondchancetolive.org/2007/11/16/traumatic-brain-injury-and-the-identified-patient-%E2%80%93-part-1/