Here is a link to the zoom presentation of the article, “Finding the Freedom from Feeling Stuck after a Brain Injury”.
I am available to give this presentation to your group, association or organization. See this link:
Several nights ago I gave my presentation Brain Injury and The Power of “I CAN” in an Ongoing Recovery Process to a brain injury support group.
After the presentation, one of the members asked a question. “How can I stop feeling stuck?”
I shared some information with the individual, however because of the limited time I decided to write this article. Write this article to share what helped me stop feeling stuck after my brain injury.
“You were born to win, but to be a winner, you must plan to win, and expect to win.” Zig Ziglar
In My Experience
In my experience, the process of finding freedom from feeling stuck began when I could no longer deny. Could no longer deny the impact of the traumatic brain injury that I sustained when I was 10 years old. When this occurred, I began to grieve what I could not change. Grieving opened the door to explore beyond the “box of my confusion” that kept me feeling stuck.
“When one door of happiness closes, another opens; but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one which has been opened for us.” Helen Keller
In my experience, and as I grieved I grew in acceptance. Acceptance gave me to freedom to realize that I could give myself permission. Permission to try something different, beyond what was not working and kept me feeling stuck. Acceptance gave me the ability to change the things that I could. Change the things that I could to be able to create my new normal. Create in ways that would work so that I could stop feeling stuck.
“Decision is the spark that ignites action. Until a decision, nothing happens.” Wilfred A. Peterson
“The most common way people give away their power is thinking they don’t have any.” Alice Walker
Create beyond Feeling Stuck
Creating my new normal helped me to find my purpose and define success for myself. Define success for myself through advocating for myself in my mind, body, spirit, soul and emotions. In the process, I was and am able to improve the quality of my life, well-being and relationships. BUT, this process just took time. Lots of time and effort to stop feeling stuck because of what I could not change — the impact of my brain injury.
“Nothing is a waste of time if you use the experience wisely.” Auguste Rodin
“Dreams do not vanish, so long as people do not abandon them.” Phantom F. Harlock
“Create your own visual style… let it be unique for yourself and yet identifiable for others.” Orson Welles
“Research your own experience. Absorb what is useful, reject what is useless and add specifically your own creation.” Bruce Lee
Reality Set In for Me
In my experience, although I wanted the process to be quick, reality set in for me. I discovered that there were no quick ways to stop feeling stuck. It just took what it took. Although there were no quick fixes, silver bullets or magic potions, I became aware of principles. Principles that I could use each day, in my process. Principles that would help me to stop feeling stuck. Stuck because of what I was/am powerless to change.
“Don’t give up at half time. Concentrate on winning in the second half.” Paul Bryant
“Sometimes adversity is what you need to face in order to become successful.” Zig Ziglar
“Not everyone will understand your journey. That’s okay. You’re here to live your life, not to make everyone understand.” Banksy
Principles that Helped me to Stop Feeling Stuck
The process of finding freedom from being stuck takes hard work, commitment, determination, drive, discipline, fortitude, persistence, tenacity and courage.
“If you want to improve your self-worth, stop giving other people the calculator.” Tim Fargo
“Ideas do not always come in a flash but by diligent trial-and-error experiments that take time and thought.” Charles K. Kao
“Ability is what you’re capable of doing. Motivation determines what you do. Attitude determines how well you do it.” Lou Holtz
Inch by Inch, life’s a Cinch. Yard by Yard, it’s very hard.
Hard work or Work-ethic
“Without hard work, nothing grows but weeds.” Gordon B. Hinckley
constantly, regularly, or habitually engaged in earnest and energetic work : INDUSTRIOUS, DILIGENT
Hard work for me means being diligent, to accomplish a task or a goal that is set before me; with focus.
Hard work involves sticking with a project or a goal to achieve the desired outcome.
For me, hard work does not mean running a sprint but involves running a marathon; which requires consistent and ongoing effort.
“It is not that I am so smart, it is just that I stay with problems longer.” Albert Einstein
“a willingness to give your time and energy to something that you believe in, or a promise or firm decision to do something” Cambridge Dictionaries online
For me commitment involves loyalty, first to myself; to stick with a goal, regardless…
Commitment communicates to me to remain undeterred from what I set out to accomplish.
Although the way that I set out to accomplish something may change, my commitment teaches me that I can find a way that will work for me to be able to accomplish my goal.
“I will prepare and someday my chance will come.” Abraham Lincoln
“is a positive emotion that involves persevering towards a difficult goal in spite of obstacles. Determination occurs prior to goal attainment and serves to motivate behavior that will help achieve one’s goal.” Wikipedia
Determination helps me to focus on what I want to accomplish, in spite of obstacles and setbacks.
Obstacles become a sign on the road that helps me to realize that adjustments need to be made to accomplish my desired goal (s).
Determination teaches me to not give up in spite of apparent obstacles and setbacks because I know that more will be revealed in time.
“I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.” Thomas Edison
“There are three major components to motivation: activation, persistence, and intensity. Activation involves the decision to initiate a behavior… Persistence is the continued effort toward a goal even though obstacles may exist… Finally, intensity can be seen in the concentration and vigor that goes into pursuing a goal.” About Education — What is Motivation
Motivation can either be external or internal. Being externally driven will only last until the threat is removed. Being internally motivated or driven, on the other hand; is sustainable because of the individual’s internal desire to achieve the skill, skill set or goal.
The drive encourages me to stick with the process and keep learning from my circumstances, my experiences and my opportunities.
“Discipline is the bridge between goals and accomplishment.” Jim Rohn
“training to act in accordance with rules; drill, activity, exercise, or a regimen that develops or improves a skill, the rigor or training effect of experience, adversity” Dictionary.com
For me, discipline means that I keep working on my craft, tweaking and taking away;
adding and making the decision to follow through to condition myself to achieving an end.
“Fortitude is the marshal of thought, the armor of the will, and the fort of reason.” Francis Bacon
For me, fortitude means that I commit to pursuing my dreams and my destiny, my vision, and mission in the face of being minimized, marginalized, dismissed and discounted.
Fortitude means that I remain true to myself, regardless of whether anyone else “gets it” or understand me. Fortitude means that I stay committed to my goals, whatever they may be at the time.
To thine own self-be true.
“Persistence and resilience only come from having been given the chance to work through difficult problems.” Gever Tulley
“the quality that allows someone to continue doing something or trying to do something even though it is difficult or opposed by other people” Merriam-Webster
For me, persistence is the decision to get up more times than I fall down.
Persistence for me means that I don’t give up regardless…
Giving up simply is not an option. Persistence means believing in myself.
“It’s not that I’m so smart, it’s just that I stay with problems longer.” Albert Einstein
“an unwillingness to yield or give up, being dogged, stubbornly, persevering and steadfast” Wiktionary
Tenacity keeps me moving toward what I want to accomplish in my life. Tenacity means that I keep looking for ways to win in life. Tenacity means that I do give myself no for an answer.
Tenacity means that I trust the process, a loving God and myself. Tenacity means that I keep moving forward.
“Courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the judgement that something is more important than fear.” Ambrose Redmoon
“The state or quality of mind or spirit that enables one to face danger, fear, or vicissitudes with self-possession, confidence, and resolution; bravery.” The Free Dictionary
Courage to me means I stay committed to the process, the footwork, and the journey. Courage helps me to remember that I do not have to do things perfectly. Courage reminds me that I can pursue excellence, instead of perfection. Courage reminds me that will all learn, there is a learning curve. Courage reminds me to stay committed to my mission and vision.
Courage gives me hope.
“Seek out that particular mental attribute which makes you feel most deeply and vitally alive, along which comes the inner voice which says, “This is the real me.” And when you have found that attitude, follow it.” William James
If you advance confidently in the direction of your dreams and endeavor to live the life that you have imagined…you will meet with a success unexpected in common hours.” Henry David Thoreau
“Insist on yourself. Never imitate. Your own gift you can present every moment with the cumulative force of a whole life’s cultivation. But of the adopted talent of another you have only an extemporaneous half-possession… Do that which is assigned to you and you can not hope too much or dare too much. ” Ralph Waldo Emerson
Below are 19 presentations. Presentations in which I share what helped and continues to helps me find the freedom from feeling stuck. If interested, click on this link: Autobiography.
To Schedule my Availability to Share these Presentations, click on this link: Availability