In the event that you are living with an invisible disability, I am writing this to you. To encourage you, as I need to encourage myself; to not give up.
Although there may be people who want or need to deny our realities, we can still excel. We can excel in our realities.
Our invisible disabilities do not have to continue to make us crazy.
We can own and accept our realities and we can move forward with our lives. We can be aware. We can create a good life for ourselves.
We can pursue our dreams and our destinies. We can create hope.
I have also created a video presentation of this article. To watch and listen to the video presentation of the article, click on this link: You Are Not Crazy. You have an Invisible Disability Video Presentation
In my past three articles, Denial and Brain Injury Recovery, Brain Injury and Anger and Brain Injury, Bargaining, Depression and Acceptance I shared my experience grieving my reality.
A reality that remained hidden to me for many years. A reality that I needed to be able to accept, but discovered I could not accept.
Could not accept without confronting my denial, processing my anger, trying to change what I did not like and working through my depression and despondency.
In these 3 articles, I shared what helped me to realize that I was not crazy. That I was living with an invisible disability.
That although I could not change my reality, I no longer had to feel limited because of my invisible disability.
That I no longer had to feel stuck, because of my invisible disability. That I could succeed.
“When one door of happiness closes, another opens; but often we look so long at the closed-door that we do not see the one which has been opened for us.” Helen Keller
Did Not Have to Make Me Crazy
What I began to realize was that I am not equipped to walk through certain doors.
What I also began to realize was that not being equipped to walk through certain doors, did not have to make me crazy.
What I began to realize was that, although; I am not equipped to walk through certain doors, I am equipped to walk through other doors.
A New Freedom
With this realization, I experienced a new freedom. A freedom to look for doors that would open for me.
With this realization came the sadness that no one wanted what I had to offer. With this realization came the challenge to believe or not believe that I was inept. Inept, because the department of vocational rehabilitation had deemed me unemployable and the Social Security Administration had declared me disabled.
A Choice
With this realization came the awareness that I could either believe the department of vocational rehabilitation and the social security administration:
(and) do nothing, stay stuck and give up
(or) I could chose a different path.
A path that would equip me and lead me to walk through other doors.
A path that would empower my ability to follow my dreams, to pursue my destiny and to be of service.
Awareness: My Experience with Interest Inventories
In my experience, I took many interest inventories in an attempt to find a career path. What I discovered was that interest inventories helped me to understand my interests but did not show me how I could BEST use my gifts, talents, and abilities.
What I discovered was that these interest inventories did not and could not factor in the impact of my invisible disability.
An invisible disability that I had no idea was getting in the way of my ability to be successful in career paths.
My Experience Beyond Interest Inventories — Finding Out What Worked Best for Me
In my experience, I would have never thought I would be using my gifts, talents, and abilities writing. In college English class, use of verbs, adjectives, conjunctions, semicolons, and the like were hard for me to grasp.
I now realize that my difficulties stemmed from my difficulties learning sequences of information. I share with you that I did poorly in English class. so as to encourage to not count out what you did poorly in high school or college.
In my experience, I discovered that my ability to communicate through writing developed over years.
Your style of creating may take time too.
What I discovered was that although I could not do some things, I could learn how to do other things very well. So, I spent 6 more years exploring how this could be accomplished. I wrote poems, an autobiography, a book (registered but not published) and then at the encouragement of a friend, a blog.
To read about my process and journey discovering what worked best for me, you are invited to click on these link:
Back Story of Second Chance to Live Part 1 and Back Story of Second Chance to Live Part 2.
Discovering What Works Just Takes Time
The reason that I share with you that it took me 6 more years before I found a way, is to encourage you. To encourage you to not give up exploring how to use your gifts, talents, and abilities to follow your dreams. Persistence, tenacity, being intentional and maintaining focus were and continue to be part of my process and journey.
Persistence, tenacity, being intentional, focused and a commitment to developing my gifts, talents and abilities. And I need to stay encouraged with the process, knowing that more will be revealed to me, with time.
Below are links to articles that I have written to share what has helped me in my process. I would invite you to click on each of the below links and read each of these articles.
The information with in these articles may also help you in your process of discovery.
If the information in these articles proves to be helpful to you, please let me know by leaving a comment.
Answering the Call that Never Came Part 1, Answering the Call that Never Came Part 2, Neuroplasticity, Small Successes and Learning / Relearning Skill Sets, Nine Habits to Benefit from Using the Principle of Neuroplasticity and From Brain Injury Awareness to Brain Injury Acceptance to Creating Hope in Our Lives
You have my permission to share my articles and or video presentations with anyone you believe could benefit, however, I maintain ownership of the intellectual property AND my articles, video presentations and eBooks are not to be considered OPEN SOURCE. Please also provide a link back to Second Chance to Live. In the event that you have questions, please send those questions to me. All questions are good questions. I look forward to hearing from you. More Information: Copyright 2007 –2017.
Thank you.I needed to find this.
You are welcome, Katie. Thank you for letting me know that the article helped you. Please share with anyone whom you believe could benefit. Thank you, Katie!!!
First off, thanks ffor the article, it is inspiring, however, my main obstacle and hang up is SSi and a 7 year struggle to have my conditions “validated” by a handfull of prejudicial doctors who just refuse to listen, has left me without a solid support system and literally eating dandelions and other plants that groew in the yard. the pressure of not having my own safe home and but camping inthe yard of a dear ex’s parents, who themselves doubt the severity of my condition, multiple, MULTIPLE traumatic brain injuries in my life . it is the political climate of where i live here in the bible belt where the motto is ” you dont work you dont eat”. any ways ….
kindest regards, Raymond Bayoud
Hi Katie and Raymond,
Thank you for what you have shared with me. In my experience, I had a long paper trail of difficulties that I experienced personally and vocationally. I also had to apply 3 times with the Social Security Administration before I was finally approved. I also went through 2 vocational rehabilitation evaluations with 2 Department of Vocational Rehabilitation (one in Florida and one in North Carolina). The process took a lot of time and a long paper trail validating the ongoing difficulties that I experienced for many years, related to interpersonal and vocational endeavors. The process, i found, took a lot of time and I am glad that I did not give up on the process. I would encourage you to reach out to your local department of social services and speak with someone to see what services you may be eligible to receive Raymond and Katie. Hang in there and don’t give up. More will be revealed with time. If you have any questions, please ask. All questions are good questions, Raymond and Katie. Thank you. Have a peaceful day. Craig
As a 27 year survivor things can only get better! The trick is “Never give up”. Never loose faith in yourself. Nobody but nobody can treat you better that you can treat yourself! You know what you want and need to be happy. Communication seems to be a common enemy of people who have survived a TBI. The common mistake is we think that they don’t understand how it feels to be brain injured. And they don’t!!!! Yet, it is not really the persons fault that is uninformed. It’s their fault for not wanting to learn how it feels to be like us. Not “wanting to Admit” that they might be wrong!
Hi DuWayne,
I agree with you. People can not give us what they themselves do not possess. The reality is that I am the one who needs to get it. Grieving my reality empowers my ability to get to a place of acceptance to be able to get into action. For people to accept reality would mean that they would have to feel feelings, they may not know how to or want to feel. For people to accept our reality, would mean that they would have to make changes, changes that they don’t know how to or want to make. Please read my article, https://secondchancetolive.org/2016/07/02/brain-injury-feel-misunderstood-shunned/. Let me know your reflections. Thank you. Craig