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Second Chance to Live

Empowering the Individual, Not the Brain Injury

Traumatic Brain Injury and Healthy Self-Care — Part 2

September 29, 2009 By Second Chance to Live

Please read Part 1 for context. Thank you.

After browsing through the journal for all of about 1 minute handed the journal back to me with out comment or expression. Initially I was stunned by the person’s indifference, but after taking my seat I realized that I had just been given a gift.

The gift opened my eyes and I finally realized that this individual was not able to be present for me.

As I thought about my “ah ha” moment I remembered some thing a friend told me. Some people are like hardware stores. They do not stock bread.Consequently, no matter how many times I may go to them hoping to find bread — be validated or get my needs met — I will come away dejected, empty handed and disappointed.

As my eyes were opened to the reality that this person was a — for me — “hardware store” I had another spiritual awakening. I could stop going to this individual looking to find bread.

With my awakening I finally realized that I could let go of my need to have and gain their validation or approval. Instead of being frustrated and disappointed — because this person could not give to me — I made the decision to stop looking to this person to give to me what they appeared not to possess — without judging the person.

With my awakening I realized that I could let go of my hurt and disappointment. I could let go of my expectation that this person could give to me what I wanted. I could make the decision to celebrate the good news with my friends. I could choose to see the proverbial glass as half full rather than half empty.

The gift of my awakening gave me the ability to practice healthy self-care. Consequently, I decided to practice live and let live. I decided to detach from my expectation that this individual could be present for me. I decided to be thankful for my friends — who were capable and interested in being present for me.

With my awakening I made the decision to be present for myself. With my awakening I found a new freedom.

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Filed Under: Building Self-Esteem after Brain Injury

Comments

  1. soulfeet says

    October 7, 2009 at 6:43 am

    Great article Craig!!

    I really like this line: “… I made the decision to be present for myself.”

    Thanks for sharing!!

    Reply
    • secondchancetolive says

      October 7, 2009 at 3:40 pm

      Thank you for your words of encouragement Carol. Godspeed to you and your family Carol.

      Craig

      Reply

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