On June 30, 2022, I will be speaking on the topic of, “Cultivating Healthy Relationships after Brain Injury and Stroke” to Brooks Rehabilitation Brain Injury Clubhouse in Jacksonville, Florida through Zoom. To view an outline of the presentation, click on this link: Cultivating Healthy Relationships after Brain Injury and Stroke Presentation To read about my process and … [Read more...]
Relationships following a Brain Injury
Relationships create challenges. Relationships after brain injury create different challenges. Each individuals brings with them their history. History in terms of what was learned and experienced growing up. History also in terms of what they experienced in past relationships. If there was dysfunction in those relationships, dysfunction will be brought into each relationship. Such dysfunction can continue to undermine and sabotage relationships. Continue to undermine and get in the way of existing relationships and other relationships... unless new boundaries and behaviors are learned and used in relationships.
Articles in this category give ways to recognize, address and change behaviors that no longer work.
Once an individual experiences a brain injury another dynamic enters into the relationship. Denial. Once external wounds have healed and the impact of the brain injury becomes invisible denial enters relationships. I can speak from personal experience. For many years I had no idea that my life was being impacted by the open skull fracture and brain injury when I was 10 years old. When asked friends would tell me that there was some thing different about me, but they could not put their "put their finger on it." I could not "put my finger on it" either because denial kept it hidden from me.
My denial and other people's denial. The result from this denial was alienation. An alienation from myself and from other people. People who could not or would not consider that my life was being impacted by a brain injury. People who could not or would not accept me and needed to believe that I was making excuses. People who needed to stay in denial, because to come out of denial would mean they would need to change. Nevertheless, the reality was that I was the only one who needed to accept and own my reality. I was the only one who could do anything about how my life being was impacted by a brain injury.
I was the only one who could do anything to change the way my life was being impacted. I was the only one who could do anything about the dysfunctional way I related to myself and other people. I was the only one who could work a program of recovery to change my behavior. I was the only one who could change the way I related to people. I was the only one who could stop participating in behaviors that no longer worked for me. I was the only one who do anything to enhance to make my life better. I was the only one who could learn how to live with and to navigate through life with a brain injury and an invisible disability.
I was the only one who could learn how to live with and to navigate through life with a brain injury and an invisible disability. I was the only one who could change my behavior so that I could begin to have functional relationships.
In the articles with in this category I share what helped me to change the way that I related to myself and other people. With in this category I speak to how I found freedom from the denial in myself and other people. In this category I share what I learned that helped me to begin to have a relationship with myself. I share what helped me to experience a freedom. A freedom that I previously never knew existed. I share what helped me to accept myself, when other people could not or would not accept me. I share what helped me to have functional relationship with myself and with other people. In this category I share hope.
Feeling Rejected, Excluded, Cliques and “The Breakfast Club” Movie
In 1985 I watched a movie, while at graduate school, The Breakfast Club. The movie was set as a comedy, however as I watched the movie the plot opened my eyes. Opened my Eyes to What I Experienced Opened my eyes to what I experienced while in high school. A "social" structure that identified individuals as being in a clique: a "jock", "a freak" or a "nerd". In my … [Read more...]
Cultivating Healthy Relationships after Brain Injury and Stroke Presentation to the Head Injury Association of Northern Nevada
On March 28, 2022, I will be speaking on the topic of “Cultivating Healthy Relationships after Brain Injury and Stroke Presentation” to the Head Injury Association of Northern Nevada, in Reno, Nevada. through Zoom. To view an outline of the presentation, click on: Cultivating Healthy Relationships after Brain Injury and Stroke Presentation To read a short bio of the … [Read more...]
Cultivating Healthy Relationships after Brain Injury and Stroke Presentation
I am available to give this presentation to your group, association, hospital, clubhouse or in any other venue. Click on link to view outline. Cultivating Healthy Relationships after Brain Injury and Stroke Presentation Relationships after Brain Injury and Stroke present a set of challenges. Challenges that often sabotage individuals and their relationships. My … [Read more...]
Having and Maintaining Friendships and Relationships after a Brain Injury Video Presentation
Having and maintaining friendships after our brain injury can leave us feeling baffled. For some reason friendships and relationships change. These changes leave us frustrated and feeling alone. Because of our frustration and feeling alone, accepting what we don’t understand can leave us feeling powerless. Powerless to change the things we can’t, can leave us … [Read more...]