TBI Brain Injury Recovery and What is my Destiny, Now?

Several years ago, the movie, Forrest Gump was applauded by those who watched Forrest’s determination.

Several lines from that movie stood out to me:

“What is my destiny, Mama?”  Forrest Gump

“Life is like a box of chocolates; you never know what you are going to get”. Forrest Gump

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TBI Brain Injury Recovery and What is My Destiny, Now?

 For an in depth look into my box of chocolates, click: Here

Living with a tbi left me believing that my destiny was lost.

That I had been given a box full of dark chocolates, bitter to my taste.

As a result, I struggled to find my way for many years.

But, thankfully, I did not give up. I have since discovered that I was blind and could not “see” what was to be.  As my “eyes” slowly opened, I discovered that dark chocolate was good for me. I also began to realize that my destiny was becoming apparent to me. Apparent to me with time and by not giving up on the process.

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 “When one door closes, another opens. But we often look so regretfully upon the closed door that we don’t see the one that has opened for us.” Helen Keller

“Ideas do not always come in a flash, but by diligent trial-and-error experiments that take time and thought.” Charles K. Kao

“Purpose is about a process and a journey. I can not know until I know and knowing just takes what it takes. There are no silver bullets or magic potions. By accepting that reality I am given the gift of knowing. I am given the gift of knowing by trusting the process, a loving God and myself.” Craig J. Phillips MRC, BA

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 So Focused

I was so focused on what I wanted and expected to happen, that I could not see what was happening. But it was not time. I still had to learn the lessons that my process and journey would reveal and provide to me.

“So often we become so focused on the finish line, that we fail to enjoy the journey.” Dieter F. Uchtdorf

The Journey is More Important than the Destination

One such lesson was a hard lesson to learn. My training in the martial arts opened my eyes. For many years I was focused on the next promotion and the color of my belt. When I was not promoted as quickly as my peers I was frustrated and a bit discouraged. As a result, I asked my Sensei.

“Why?”, despite my Hard Work and Dedication

I asked my Sensei (martial arts instructor), ‘Why?”. Why I was not promoted to the next belt and rank. He told me that if I was asking, I was not ready. I could not grasp what he meant at the time. “Why?” I was not ready mystified me because I trained hard. But, I am glad that I kept training.

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“All life is an experiment. The more experiments the better.” Ralph Waldo Emerson

Not Giving up on the Process or the Journey

As I continued to train at the martial arts school, I struggled to understand. And then one day I had a spiritual awakening that changed my life. I began to realize; as with a new dawn, that the outcome of a promotion to the next belt color and rank meant little. Meant little, unless I had learned the lessons.

Meant Little, unless I had learned

 The lessons at that stage in my development as a martial artist. Apart from learning those lessons (skills and skill sets), I would not be equipped. Be equipped to be able to participate in the lessons (skills and skill sets) at the next belt color and ranking. And I needed to trust the process and timing.

What another instructor told me was that a belt is only something that holds your pants up.

Sensei did me a Tremendous favor

What I learn on the journey is more important than the destination.  Being promoted to the next rank and color would mean nothing apart from the lessons given to me through my training. Given to me on my way to prepare me to participate in the lessons (skills and skill sets) of the next rank and belt color.

With my awareness my martial arts training took on a new meaning.

This awareness helped me to refocus my motives. My life as a result; beyond my training and journey in the martial arts, took on new meaning, too. In the process, my motivation in life changed forever. What I learn along the way in my process and on my journey is of far greater importance.

Far greater importance than obtaining a brown or black belt or any other outcome in my life.

Any other outcome in life. The journey of learning is more important that the goal or outcome. What we become on the way is essential to who you I become. Who we become is not the outcome. What we become gives us the chance to succeed.

“What you get by achieving your goals is not as important as what you become by achieving your goals.” Zig Ziglar

Living in the Present Moment

 Living in the present moment is what equips me to empty my mind. Empty my mind of the expectation of a specific outcome. In the process, I am then able to use my time and energy on what I am learning in the present moment.

Learn in the present moment, instead of being distracted.

 As I become fully present in the moment, I am able to let go of the outcome. By letting go of the outcome, I am able to focus my time and energy on one skill and one skill at a time. In the process, I am able to learn how to use what works for me.

Works for me through my skills, talents and abilities to fulfill my purpose and my destiny in the now.

 Riddle: How do you eat and elephant?  Answer: One bite at a time.

Be Encouraged my Friend

 Life does not have to look different than it does. Our destiny is being revealed. We do not need to build a legacy. Our life paints, as it were with a brush each day. With each circumstance and lesson revealed to us.

“Nothing is a waste of time if you use the experience wisely.” Auguste Rodin

Courage helps us to be willing to learn from each lesson. Courage reminds us to keep painting with what we learn. Each skill and each skill set. Courage encourages you and I to realize that with each brush stroke our destiny is being revealed.

“Don’t give up at half time. Concentrate on winning the second half.” Bear Bryant

Is being revealed in the present, with each brush stroke, by not giving up on the process and ourselves. By doing the footwork, letting go of the outcomes and trusting the process, a loving God and ourselves.

“Decision is the spark that ignites action. Until a decision is made, nothing happens.” Wilfred A. Peterson

“We must be willing to let go of the life we planned, so as to have the one that is waiting for us.” Joseph Campbell

“Not everyone will understand your journey. That’s okay. You’re here to live your life, not to make everyone understand.” Banksy

“Research your own experience. Absorb what is useful, reject what is useless and add specifically your own creation.” Bruce Lee

“Though no one can go back and make a brand new start, anyone can start from now and make a brand new ending.” Carl Bard

“Everyone is trying to accomplish something big, not realizing that life is made up of little things.” Frank A. Clark

“Don’t judge each day by the harvest you reap, but by the seeds you plant.” Robert Louis Stevenson

“Don’t quit. Never give up trying to build the world you can see, even if others can’ see it. Listen to your own drum and your own drum only. It is the one that makes the sweetest sound.” Simon Sineck