If you have not already read Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5, Part 6, Part 7, Part 8 , Part 9, Part 10, Part 12 of this series please take the time to do so my friend. Thank you.
I continued to play out my role with in the denial system until the pain of staying in my role exceeded the “comfort” and “normalcy” that I thought I had been experiencing by living out my the role with in the denial system.
Through my recovery process, I began to realize that I needed to address the reasons why I lived my life as a reactor. I began to realize that I needed to address and confront the role that I had been assigned to or assumed in my family, my relationships and my environment. I began to realize that I needed to examine how my traumatic brain injury and invisible disability impacted, fueled and perpetuated my role as an identified patient.
Through my recovery process, I discovered that I had discarded parts of myself that created pain for me while living with in my role in the denial system. Through my recovery process, I discovered that I had subsequently developed a false self in my attempt to acclimate and survive with in the denial system. Through my recovery process, I discovered that I did not know who was living in my body.
Through my recovery work, I discovered that I did not know how to live in my own skin. Through my recovery process, I discovered that I needed to learn how to accept myself as an individual apart from the identity of my role, the denial system or my traumatic brain injury and invisible disability. Through my recovery work, I discovered that I was never meant to be defined by a role, a denial system or by my brain injury / invisible disability.
Please read the conclusion in Part 12. Thank you.
If you have not already read Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5, Part 6, Part 7, Part 8 , Part 9 , Part 10, Part 12 of this series please take the time to do so my friend. Thank you.
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