As individuals living with brain injuries we are in the process of trying to figure out how to live our lives and what works for us. Because we are in the process of figuring out how to live our lives, we may feel vulnerable.
In our vulnerability, we may find ourselves guessing at what is normal. In the process of trying to sort things out, we may find ourselves questioning our judgment. We may also be struggling to trust ourselves.
In response, we may find that we are trading our judgment for other people’s judgment. In the process, we may unknowingly entrust ourselves to untrustworthy people.
In our vulnerability, these individuals may seek to take advantage of us. Once we invite them into our lives, they may use different ways to control, manipulate and intimidate us for their own agendas and gain.
Being vulnerable can leave or open us to up to being bullied. Being vulnerable can leave us susceptible to being bullied. As a result, we may be led to believe that we can not trust ourselves.
By not trusting ourselves we may be led to believe what other people want us to believe about ourselves.
Through buying into those beliefs, we may find that we deserve to be mistreated and bullied. Such treatment and bullying can lead us to believe that we don’t deserve to be more than we are led to believe about ourselves by those individuals.
Individuals who then take advantage of our being vulnerable.
Merriam Webster defines intimidation as: to make timid or fearful: frighten; especially: to compel or deter by or as if by threats.
Dictionary.com defines intimation as: to make timid; fill with fear, to overawe or cow, at through force of personality or by superior display of wealth, talent, ect., to force into or deter from action by inducing fear.
Vocabulary.com defines intimidation as: You can see “timid” in the middle of intimidating, and to be timid is to be frightened or to pull back from something. When you intimidate, you frighten or make someone afraid.”To frighten” or “make fearful” is at the root of the verb intimidate.
Intimidation can be mental, emotional, spiritual and physical or a combination of one or more ways.
Finding Freedom From Being Bullied
In April 2010 I wrote a 7 Part article in which I share what I helped me to grow in awareness, about bullying and what helped to set me free from the impact of being bullied.
The information helped and continues to help me to take a different course of action. A different course of action as I interact with individuals who may seek to take advantage of my being vulnerable after my brain injury.
I would encourage you to read each part of the article in order.
As I became aware, I became less vulnerable. As I became less vulnerable, I found a new freedom. A freedom to be aware. A freedom to be me. A freedom to ask for what I need without fear. A freedom from the impact of being bullied. A freedom to trust.
Be Aware of Bullies
Through becoming aware and finding freedom I discovered that I no longer had to remain vulnerable or intimidated by bullies. Instead, I could recognize them and take steps to take care of myself. Take care of myself when bullies seek to take advantage of my vulnerability through intimidation. Intimidation that can often present itself in subtle ways, with the motivation to control and manipulate you and I. Control and manipulate us into fulfilling their agendas for their plans and purposes.
Plans and purposes to exploit and take advantage of our being vulnerable.
In my experience, I have found that being bullied does not have to be limited to individuals.. In my experience, I have found myself bullied by groups of individuals. In April 2013 I wrote a series to share what I discovered through being bullied by different groups. I will include links to the 3 Parts of this series.
Click on each link to the part of the article series and each part will open for you.
If you find yourself being bullied by a group, realize being bullied is about them. Being bullied is not about you. You are not the perpetrator. Recognize what is going on and detach yourself from the group.
In the Event that You Find Yourself Bullied
In the event that you find yourself being bullied, be it physical, mental, emotional, spiritual or psychological; realize that you are not at fault.
Bullies do what they do to intimidate, control and manipulate for their own gain.
Learning How to Trust Myself
In my experience, I had to detach from groups, organizations, and churches that sought to control, manipulate and bully me in order to begin to learn how to trust again. To learn how to trust my judgment. To learn how to trust myself.
To learn how to trust a loving God. To learn how to trust trustworthy people. To learn how to establish relationships with individuals and groups who do not exist by control, manipulation or intimidation.
“I realized that bullying never has to do with you. It’s the bully who’s insecure.” Shay Mitchell
What may Have set you Up to be Bullied
In November 2007 I wrote a 2 Part article, Traumatic Brain Injury, and the Identified Patient to share an awareness that helped me understand what made me vulnerable to bullying and intimidation from an early age.
Click on the below 2 links to read what I discovered that set me up to be vulnerable and to believe that I deserved to be bullied.
What set me up to be vulnerable to bullying and intimidation may have also set you up to also be vulnerable.
In the process of being vulnerable, you may also believe that you deserve to be bullied.
You have my permission to share my articles and or video presentations with anyone you believe could benefit, however, I maintain ownership of the intellectual property AND my articles, video presentations, and eBooks are not to be considered OPEN SOURCE. Please also provide a link back to Second Chance to Live. In the event that you have questions, please send those questions to me. All questions are good questions. I look forward to hearing from you. More Information: Copyright 2007 –2018.