Are you living with the impact of a brain injury? Do you experience fear and anxiety? Would you like to create new realities? If so, I would invite you to read today’s article.
Several days ago I wrote and published the article, Moving Beyond the Mindset of a “Survivor” to Create Possibilities, I shared some principles in that article that helped me realize that I no longer have to stay stuck. Stay stuck like a deer caught in the headlights, not realizing that I have choices. Choices that will help me to give me hope. Choices that helped me to realize that I could live outside of the “box” of my limitation.
If the mindset of survivor keeps the individual focused on a diagnosis, a label, a stereotype and a stigmatization, then the individual does themselves a favor by moving beyond a mindset that limits and keeps them in a “box” of limitation. Grieve your reality and then set out on a course to create a new reality.
During the past several days I have been thinking about a quote that also gave me hope. as I have been experiencing some depression. This quote gave me a gift to realize that I could take an inventory of my thoughts and feelings. The thoughts and feelings that led to my experiencing some depression. The quote reminded me that I could take a different course of action. A different course of action that would help me to stop feeling depressed.
“If you do not like something, change it. If you can not change it, change the way you think about it.” Mary Engelbreit
Based on my previous experience I remembered something that had helped me in the past. I remembered a short, but powerful reality. My reactions / My reality. As I reflected on those 4 words I remembered that I could examine how I interacted with people, places, and things. I remembered that I could take an inventory of what I thought and how I felt as I interacted with people, places, and things. By examining how I interacted with people, places and things I became aware of how I felt and thought about those situations and what led to my depression.
By taking an inventory of what led to my anxiety and depression, I was able to change the way I looked at those situations. By changing the way I looked at what led to my anxiety and depression I was able to change my reality. The reality of how I felt about the situation that led to my experiencing, fear, anxiety, and depression. What I discovered helped me to stop berating myself. What I discovered helped me to change my reality and gave me hope. Hope, that in turn helped me to realize that I could create a new possibility. A new possibility to create a new reality.
In the process of creating a new reality, I realized that I could get different results that would empower my life and my relationships.
An Example of How Changing my Reality Empowered my Life and Relationship
Last year I wrote an article in which I shared how I was able to create a new reality. Below are excerpts from the article.
“Several days ago, during and after a phone conversation I found myself agitated at the person. The morning after the phone call, I wrote them a letter and was preparing to mail that letter later in the day to tell them what they needed to do to avoid triggering my fear and anxiety in the future. But as the day moved on, I had an uneasy feeling about sending the letter. Amidst my uneasy feelings, about sending the letter, I realized that my”triggers” had been pushed. Triggers that had been pushed that brought up fear and anxiety in me. In response to my uneasiness, I took the letter out of the sealed and stamped envelope and re-read what I had written to the individual.
As I read the letter, I realized that I was reacting out of my own fear and anxiety. With my awareness, I realized the fear and anxiety, that I was experiencing; was my responsibility and not the other person’s responsibility. With my awareness, I realized that sending the letter would not resolve my fear and anxiety, only shift the responsibility for my fear and anxiety. The individual who triggered my fear and anxiety was not responsible for my feeling insecure.With my awareness, I realized that I needed to examine both the trigger and my fear and anxiety. By owning my trigger and through examining my fear and anxiety I was able to own my power. By owning my trigger, by examining my fear and anxiety I was able to empower both myself and my relationship.
With my awareness, I decided to tear up and throw the letter away. With my decision, I owned my power. With my decision, I owned my responsibility for my fear and anxiety. By taking responsibility I created a new reality for myself and my relationship.
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