Recently I wrote a 2 part article series, Freedom from Feeling Excluded. I would invite you to read both parts of this article as I explain how to exclusion takes place, through the use of labels, stereotypes and stigmatization and “boxes”.
If you have not already read the 2 Part articles, I would encourage you to do so by clicking on the below 2 links:
In April of 2013 I wrote a 3 part article, Is the Group that You are In Hurting You — Are you being Bullied? to share some insights, that I gained through my recovery process. The insights that I share helped me to understand what set me up to be bullied. The insights that I share in this 3 part article helped and help me to recognize when I am being bullied. The insights that I share in this 3 part article helped and help me to recover from the impact of being bullied. The insights that I share in this 3 part article helped and help me to succeed despite being bullied.
I would invite you to read my 3 part article, by clicking on the following links.
To watch and listen to the video presentation of the 3 Part article, you may do so by clicking on the following links:
Through being aware of when I was / am being bullied by a group — be it a support group, a church group, a civic or any other kind of group — I have / am able to make better choices.
Choices that are good for me. Choices that will empower my life.
When I am being bullied by a group, for whatever reason; I need to remember that I am not what the group or the individual may be communicating to me. I do not deserve to be bullied or abused, as bullies may want me to believe. When I am being bullied, I need to remember that bullying is not about me. Bullying is about someone trying to control and manipulate me to fulfill or accomplish their set agenda or intention.
Through understanding how and when a group or individual is bullying me, I need to remember that my identity is not what the bully may want me to believe about myself. My identity is not tied to the group or the individual who may be bullying me. I do not have to fear reprisal. Although a bully may not want me to believe that I have the power, I have the power to define my life.
“Never be bullied into silence. Never allow yourself to be made a victim. Accept no one’s definition of your life; define yourself.”
We can replace the notion that we are failures, that bullies may want us to believe; by learning how to use our gifts, talents, and abilities in ways that work for us. We can replace the identity — given to us by a bully — with the identity that we create for ourselves. We can stop being bullied by learning to trust our judgment, instead of deferring to the judgment of a group or an individual.
We can replace the identity, that a bully may want us to maintain, with how we choose to live our lives. We can stop being bullied by deciding to run our own race, not the race that someone else wants us to run. We can stop being bullied by staying committed to the vision and mission that we have for our lives.
We can stop being bullied by living our lives to the full, in our mind, body, and spirit.
“Insist on yourself, never imitate. Your own gift you can present with the cumulative force of a whole lives cultivation, but of the adopted talent of another, you only have an extemporaneous half-possession. Do that which is assigned to you and you can not hope too much or dare too much.” Ralph Waldo Emerson
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