Hello and welcome back to Second Chance to Live my friend. I am happy to have you around my table. In today’s article, I would like to share an awareness that I had that may be helpful to you. Several days ago, during and after a phone conversation I found myself agitated at the person. The morning after the phone call, I wrote them a letter and was preparing to mail that letter later in the day to tell them what they needed to do to avoid triggering my fear and anxiety in the future. But as the day moved on, I had an uneasy feeling about sending the letter.
Amidst my uneasy feelings, about sending the letter, I realized that my”triggers” had been pushed. Triggers that had been pushed that had brought up fear and anxiety in me.
In response to my uneasiness, I took the letter out of the sealed and stamped envelope and re-read what I had written to the individual. As I read the letter, I realized that I was reacting out of my own fear and anxiety. With my awareness, I realized that the fear and anxiety, that I was experiencing; was my responsibility and not the other person’s responsibility –who I was set to make responsible and blame for my fear and anxiety in my letter. With my awareness, I realized that I sending the letter would not resolve my feeling fearful and anxious, but only shift the blame.
I subsequently decided to tear up the letter and throw it away.
The above awareness reminded me that I need to take responsibility for my fear and anxiety, instead of shifting the blame to the other person, who inadvertently triggered my fear and anxiety. Through owning responsibility for my fear and anxiety, I remembered that I could be empowered by examining both the trigger and my fear and anxiety related to the trigger. Through owning and examining the trigger, fear and anxiety, related to the topic of discussion I had with the individual; I am able to stop being / feeling victimized by the trigger, fear, and anxiety.
And then I remembered something a very wise lady shared with me, “If nothing changes, it will remain the same.”
Examining Triggers that Result in Self-Victimization
Through owning, examining and making the decision to keep the focus on myself I am able to defang the trigger and stop victimizing myself.
Through owning, examining and defanging the trigger, by owning the responsibility for my fear and anxiety; I am able to arrest the power of self-victimization.
Through owning responsibility for my triggers, fear, and anxiety, I am able to prevent the rupture of relationships.
Through owning responsibility for my triggers, fear, and anxiety, I am able to find serenity in the midst of my fear and anxiety; despite my fear and anxiety.
Through owning responsibility for my triggers, fear, and anxiety, my life takes on new meaning through creating a new reality.
In the event that you find yourself agitated by someone, take a step back. Examine why you are feeling agitated by them.
By doing so you may find that you are able to stop victimizing yourself.
By doing so, you may be able to defang the power of self-victimization.
By doing so, you may be able to prevent the rupture of relationships.
By doing so, you may find serenity in the midst of your fear and anxiety despite your fear and anxiety.
By doing so, you may find your life taking on new meaning, apart from being a victim.
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