In the event that you have not read Part 1 and Part 2 of this article, please click on the following links:
In my experience, shame has the effect on me, as when a deer is caught in the headlights of a vehicle. In the headlights, the deer can neither think or move. Shame has a similar impact upon me, in that when I am faced with shame, I feel stuck — metaphorically speaking — and do not know what to do.
In Part 1 of this article I shared what I learned about how shame sets individuals up to be manipulated. In Part 2 of this article series, I shared how shame impacted my life and relationships. In this 3rd and final part of this series, I will share some of the solutions and strategies that help me when I am faced with the impact of shame.
Note: My recovery process from the impact of debilitating shame and the effects of toxic shame based codependency — as described in the dance in Part 2 — began when I reached an emotional bottom in my life. The pain of that emotional bottom motivated me to do what I saw was working in the lives of individual who were working a program of recovery.
In my experience and through my recovery process I use tools and strategies to help me to recognize when I am being shamed and manipulated. These tools and strategies help me to move and walk away from the impact that debilitating shame has upon my life. I do not use these tools and strategies perfectly, however when I work them, they work for me.
I have previously written a 2 part article series and created a 2 part video presentation to share what I learned through my recovery process. Below I will provide a link to both series.
What I share in the article and video series is an ongoing process. I have not arrived, however I have found that when I use these solutions and strategies, I am better able to recognize when I am being shamed and manipulated. Through being aware of when I am being shamed and manipulated, I am better able to make healthier choices with whom I spend my time.
Video Presentation Series
You have my permission to share my articles and or video presentations with anyone you believe could benefit, however, please attribute me as being the author of the article (s) video presentation (s), and provide a link back to the article (s) on Second Chance to Live. In the event that you have questions, please send those questions to me. All questions are good questions. Thank you. I look forward to hearing from you. Copyright 2016.