Hello and welcome back to Second Chance to Live my friend. Have you ever asked the question, “What is keeping me stuck? In March of 2007 I wrote an article that helped me to answer that question, “What is keeping me stuck?”. What I discovered helped me to begin to live my life in a new and empowering way.
I would like to share a revised and updated version of that article with you. I will include that Part 1 of the article below. I will share Part 2 of the article tomorrow. If the information proves to be helpful, please let me know. Thank you. I look forward to hearing from you.
What is Keeping You Stuck?
In many families where ongoing conflict persists, a heightened tolerance for emotional pain ensues. Denial, rather than resolution become the goal. Repression, shame, and blame then become tools that are used to perpetuate the need to deny what exists. Defending the denial that contains the conflict or emotional pain becomes the priority. Overtime all the members of the family assume different roles to perpetuate the lie. Denial perpetuates the drama that contains the conflict. Each individual within the family system denies their authentic self to avoid conflict. Maintaining the role becomes more important than becoming a separate and autonomous individual. The role then becomes the person’s identity and drama becomes the vehicle to feel alive.
For many years, I stayed in my role as a scapegoat because I believed that I was responsible for people, places, and things. By focusing on the drama, my ability to individuate atrophied. My time and energy were devoted to managing the conflict. Rather than focusing on solutions, I was duped into believing that the drama would somehow save me. It was only after I experienced an emotional bottom that I became willing to look for solutions. Through this process, I came to understand that the role I had been living did not represent God’s will for me. Through this process, I came to understand that a loving God did not create me to be a victim. I came to understand that a loving God created me to fulfill a specific purpose, to fulfill His plan and destiny for my life.
Please read Part 2 of this article. To read Part 2 of this article, please click here Part 2.
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