Hello and welcome back to Second Chance to Live. I am happy to see that you decided to stop by to visit with me. Over the course of the past 2 days I re-learned an important lesson. On Thanksgiving Day I allowed an expectation of mine to cloud my judgment. The decision to voice my disappointment because my expectation was not met set in motion a series of events that escalated hurt feelings. These hurt feelings spawned a series of emails that resulted in accusations and name calling. I should have done the wise thing and detach, but in my upset I continued to stir the pot.
Having expectations is not wrong, but the way in which those expectations are voiced can make all the difference in the world. In my instance, I made the decision to voice my expectation in an accusatory fashion. Understandably – in retrospect – I realize why the exchanges deteriorated in our emails. With each exchange I found myself becoming increasingly agitated, angry, irritable, restless and discontent. Thankfully, I made the decision to call one of my mentors to share how I was hurt and angry. As we spoke, he stated that the matter needed to stop and I was the one who needed to stop the exchanges.
Resentment is like drinking poison and waiting for the other person to die.” Carrie Fisher
As we spoke, he reminded me of a spiritual idiom. Whenever we are irritable, restless and discontent we need to quiet ourselves and not make any decisions until our emotions have settled. As we continued to discuss the matter, I found myself becoming spiritually centered. After we ended our conversation, I went about my business. Approximately 20 minutes later I found that I had a tremendous peace concerning the matter. With my awareness, I made the decision to make a phone call to make my amends for the part that I played in the matter. My amends were received, I was forgiven and feelings were healed.
“Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned.” Siddhartha Buddha
There is a spiritual solution when we are irritable, restless and discontent.
- We examine our thoughts and behaviors for selfishness, dishonesty, resentment, and fear.
- When we become aware of these attitudes, we immediately ask God to remove them.
- We discuss them with someone as soon as possible.
- We make amends, if called for.
- We look for someone to help.
Here is my Contact page. Send comments and questions and I will respond to you.
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