Denial had — in essence — blinded me from the truth — so that I could not see how my life had become unmanageable.
With my awareness, I did what was suggested and began looking for a sponsor — to guide me through the 12 suggested steps of recovery. Please read my article, Second Chance to Live and Action Steps. Someone who would become my mentor. Someone who would be willing to share what they learned as they worked through the 12 steps of recovery — with a sponsor. Someone who would help me to identify why my life had become unmanageable. Someone who could help me to find answers and solutions to empower my life — so that I could go and make it a good day.
Consequently, as I continued to attend support/recovery meetings I listened closely to what various members shared.
As I listened I began to respect and value what several of the men were sharing during the meetings. Consequently, I got up the courage and asked each of those men to sponsor me. My experience was such that of the men that I asked to be my sponsor no one could commit to being my sponsor — because of their schedules or because they were already sponsoring other men. I thanked those men and continued to look for a man to be my sponsor.
Note: As a rule, men sponsor men and women sponsor women.
As I continued to attend meetings and listen to what people shared, I decided to ask another man to be my sponsor. When I asked him to be my sponsor, he told me that he could be my temporary sponsor — as he had to travel every week with his job — and would not always be available to me. Because I respected his program of recovery I agreed and asked him to be my temporary sponsor. With time, that man became my permanent sponsor and a trusted friend.
Note: By asking someone to be a temporary sponsor the pressure of “commitment” is removed until both you and your sponsor feel comfortable with one another and a bond of trust has been established. Once the bond has been established and both of you feel comfortable with the relationship you can ask them to be your permanent sponsor.
With time I discovered that I could talk, trust and feel. Please read my article, Don’t Talk, Don’t Trust and Don’t Feel
And so my recovery process took on a new dimension and I took another step out of the shadows.
Please read Part 10 of this series by clicking on this link. Thank you. Part 10
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