Hello and welcome back to Second Chance to Live. Today is December 24 — Christmas eve. First let me say, Merry Christmas to you and your family. Over the past several days I have been experiencing some sadness. My sadness has been because I would like somethings to be different than they are in a few of my relationships.
“If you do not like some thing, change it, if you can not change it, change the way you think about it.” Mary Engelbreit
After years of struggling in my attempt (s) to change these individuals point of view — concerning how my tbi has impacts my life and my relationships — I am learning to let go. Although I would like to change people’s perceptions concerning how my traumatic brain injury impacts my relationships, I realize that such an awareness may never occur.
“When you are in a state of non-acceptance, it is difficult to learn. A clenched fist can not receive a gift, and a clenched psyche — grasped tightly against the reality of what must not be accepted — can not easily receive a lesson.” Roger John
Through my process, I am coming to accept a reality — it is as it is. With my growing acceptance I realize that I too have choices. Consequently, I am choosing to change my perspective. By doing so I validate my reality while learning to let go of my sadness and disappointment. By doing so I am learning to practice live and let live.
By doing so I am able to move forward with my life. By doing so I am able to learn the next lesson.
A friend of mine reminds me when I look to specific people — to give me what they do not have to give — I set myself up to be hurt and disappointed. My friend reminds me that when I look to people to give to me what they do not possess I am essentially going to a hardware store looking to find bread, where no bread exists.
As a traumatic brain injury survivor you may want to have better relationships with specific people, however their lack of acceptance impedes that from occurring. As a result, you may find yourself both sad and disappointed. Although those relationships may never go back to the way they were before our tbi, we can have peace.
We can live in peace with ourselves. We can live in peace because we know that we are doing our best. We can be at peace because we no longer need to live in denial. We can live in peace because we own our reality. We can be at peace with ourselves because we can let go.
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