Hello and welcome back to Second Chance to Live. I am happy to see that you decided to stop by to visit with me. Through my recovery process I have discovered a life changing reality. For many years I felt like a pinball that was inadvertently bounced from one wall to the other by the rudders of life. In the process, I was led to believe that there was nothing I could do about the way in which I was reacting to life. Consequently, I felt helpless to what was happening in my life.
Through my experience I spent much of my time and energy seeking to endure, survive and then recuperate from the gauntlet of my reactions to what I believed was happening to me. In the process I became a resident reactor in my life. Through a series of events I began to realize what I was doing to myself. Consequently, I made a decision to embark on a new way of living. Through my process I made the decision to explore why I reacted to various people, places and things.
When I took the focus off of other people and began examining why I was reacting — to people, places and things — I discovered that in all my reactions I was the common denominator. In the midst of awareness I slowly came to accept that I was powerless over people, places, and things. Through considering my powerlessness something became abundantly clear to me. Even though I am powerless over people, places, and things I am not powerless over how I choose to react to those people, places and things.
With my awareness and acceptance I have been able to change the way in which I respond to the people, places and situations that are apart of my life. I have discovered that although I may not always like the people, places and things in my life, I have the power to choose. With my power to choose I am able to engage in active — rather than reactive — choices. Through my process I discovered that in order for me to make active or healthy choices in my life, I needed to stop blaming the people, places and things in my life — for the way that I choose to react.
In order to make active rather than reactive choices in my life I had to stop making other people responsible for my reactions. To make active choices I could no longer affix blame to anyone or anything for my choices. I needed to stop reacting to people, places and things in order to be able to keep the focus on myself.
As I keep the focus on myself I am capable of making the choice to learn from my reactions. By choosing to learn from my reactions –rather than blaming my reactions on anyone or anything — I am able to respond to the people, places and things that become a part of my life. By keeping the focus on myself I am able to harness the the power of my reactions.
Consequently, I am able to draw from the well of my experience — because of my reactions — instead of being bruised because of my reactions.
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